cupcakes and springtime and what the future holds

I made a batch of springtime vanilla cupcakes last weekend, with pale green and cream-colored frosting swirled on top. And oh, they were delicious--cupcakes are, in my humble opinion, small bundles of bliss. I like them not only for their flavor (which seems all the more wonderful for their petite size) and their potential for decoration, but for the memories they bring back from my childhood. 

That's why I always put those miniscule round nonpareil sprinkles on top, even though I don't particularly love them. As far as flavor, I am ambivalent, but they remind me of when I was a small child, wearing an apron and standing on the worn blue stepladder to help my mom bake a birthday cake for Daddy. As the sunbeams slanted into the warm kitchen, we would bake a square cake with white frosting and sprinkles. Mom always let me choose the sprinkles. We would lick the frosting beaters, and put striped candles on the properly adorned cake, and we would hide it on top of the refrigerator until after dinner...  

Maybe the memories contribute to my vast enjoyment of baking. I do enjoy it very much. I usually bake when I'm home alone, and I turn up the 30's music on the record player, or listen to a staticky radio opera, or some random solo piano or Celtic album. And then I measure and stir and think about life in general, past, present, and future. I like baking because it's methodical, relaxing, contemplative (at least in my case), and in the end it amounts to something delicious. My mind, my stomach, and my family all appreciate my baking.

So, lately my thoughts have turned to the future and college. In retrospect, this year seems to have flown by. I'm not very old, but I've definitely felt time accelerate as I've gotten older. Things don't last as long as they used to when I was small. Although some days have seemed to drag on and on and on, the school year is almost over. Then next year I'll be a senior (!)  and then comes graduation, and my two years of general college studies. After that? I don't know. I'm planning to transfer to a different university, but I don't know where because I haven't decided what I want to study. 

Sometimes I'm half-envious of my friends who have their college chosen, future career selected, major and minor all spelled out, etc.--all that decided and nailed down. It's not that clear-cut for me, because my interests are rather spread out in various directions. I have a bouquet of rosy ideas, and my dilemma is to choose a single bloom and to make a wise and thoughtful choice. But then I remember that I have another five or six semesters before I have to decide, and by then I'll have a better idea of where my skills and interests are strongest.

While I think that planning for the future is crucial, and that remembering the past is also essential, I also realize that I live in the present. So right now, I expand my intellect and knowledge at school, and I shape and hone the skills and gifts God has richly blessed me with, and I learn and grow and be me, and I trust that He will give me the wisdom I need at the right time so that I may make the right choice. We'll figure it out, and I'm not in a rush. 

Here's a springtime cupcake for you: